My Letter Concerning The Abuse Of My Child

This is a letter that I wrote to the individuals who were at the administrative level at school district 4. I will comment on their reaction to it after I complete the copy of the original:

To Whom It May Concern,

May I first say a word about my precious child named Griffin? He is such a pleasant and joyful child who loves to laugh and with that laughter he has warmed the hearts of many people. He sheds his light on those we meet in public and always brings a smile to their faces. He has certainly taught me more in the past six years than I could have ever taught him. I am a blessed and truly grateful mother.

When Griffin started school, one that I had heard so many great things about and therefore I entrusted my child to the staff there even though I did not know them, I was apprehensive....something just didn't feel right about it. Apparently after some time, as reported by his teacher, he began to have some undesirable behaviors. I began receiving daily reports that were long, very detailed (as far as what he did), and always very negative. What concerned me the most was that the child who she described was not the one with whom I was familiar, so I tried to communicate with her by leaving notes on a steno pad in his backpack to no avail. Despite all my efforts not only through writing but also by phone calls & e-mail messages, and by speaking to her when I would drop him off or pick him up. April, his teacher (EMR teacher) was always evasive and could never seem to address the issues at hand. I had asked on many occasions, even in the IEP meetings, that she write some good reports about him and not just the negative because when he had a good day all she would do is to put a smiley face on the paper. She told me that she didn't have the time and I replied that if she had the time to write negative reports that she had time to to do the opposite as well. Until the very last day of school she never wrote one good report about my child. I had merely made the requests because it was important for me to know as much as possible about how he is doing in the classroom and what was being done about it.

In the IEP meetings specifically I asked to have a BIP (behavioral intervention plan) in place and this was not the first time asking. I knew that his behaviors and his consequences were affecting his ability to learn by continually distracting him from completing his work. Once I realized that I wasn't getting anywhere with April through prior attempts to communicate. I asked her if she knew of any child psychologists in the area and she highly recommended one that she had taken classes from while in college. I took him to this woman for a very brief visit and she gave me some papers for April to fill out, which I wanted copies of but of course this wish was not granted. The papers were concerning his behaviors, when they occured (before and after what had happened), and how the behaviors were dealt with. I had finally felt that something was going to be done to help him and I was going to see how and what April had been doing to and for my child.

By this time, when I would ask April if she had filled out the papers she continuously told me that she had not but meant to. When I reminded her that I wanted copies because I wanted to know what kind of consequences he was getting and if he was in turn getting positive reinforcement as well, for his "good" behaviors, she would not reply. At this point I wrote a letter to her and asked as nicely as I could to please help me help my son and for us to be on the same page in order for him to not only learn in school but for him to not continue to only know negativity and learn to hate school.

Despite all my efforts in asking for a special (unscheduled) IEP meeting, which I had every right to, it was never granted. I would not give up on my child, I refused to get angry instead I wanted to keep trying to work it out. I had not even considered home schooling at this point, I wanted to have faith the the system would work for us and that there would be harmony.

April did not report on the daily report, that she had kept him out of recess, all of his related arts classes (which he needed for future mainstreaming attempts), and made him sit in time out for 20 minutes (he is only 6 years old and I cannot "make" him sit for 5 minutes) just for coming out of the bathroom stall, not the bathroom itself but just the stall, with his pants down!!!!!!!!! I was quite disturbed by this and felt that those were severe consequences for something that he didn't even know was socially unacceptable! I also felt that it was a severe consequence for him to be denied access to the only time during the day when he has physical exercise and has time to self-regulate himself and to cope with his sensory needs that were accumulated during his time inside being punished in time out. She severely punished him by denying him the inclusion time in a regular classroom which he has had little experience with since being in her classroom. Not only that but I wondered how much April actually knew about autism because to take an autistic child away from his peers is actually a reward since they prefer to be alone anyhow.

I told one of her assistants that I did not want him missing recess no matter what and I was very serious when I told her. The next thing that I knew I had received a rather angry call from the principal, Hope. She insisted that Griffin needed to learn consequences and she would not even address the issues that it was a severe punishment to keep him out of all of those activities and to make him walk laps around the gym during recess and that he needed the inclusion time as well.

It is my understanding that my child has the right to attend recess, by law, and all of the other services such as inclusion time. Griffin is only six years old and he is autistic, he doesn't know what is socially acceptable and frankly he doesn't care either because that is a major part of having autism.

I had written to this alleged "child psychologist" and said that Griffin was a brilliant child, scoring at the 81st percentile for his age/peer group and that I felt that he wasn't being challenged and that he was being mistreated for his behaviors. Lest I forget that the two of them were buddies from college and the next thing I knew Griffin was being punished more, more negative reports than ever, and April totally ignored me............TOTALLY! Well, I had done it for sure at this point and now my child was going to pay for it! I felt completely and utterly helpless and even when I had an advocate in the IEP meetings there was obviously nothing that was going to be done about it and and I didn't know where or whom to turn to.

Regretfully, I signed the documents in the IEP meetings because even with and advocate from the SC Autism Society (who did not help me at all) I was devastated and defeated. The benefits that they had promised me and had written on his IEP were not followed through with, I am certain, because he was still being punished for his autistic behaviors, it was all for naught and it had been a complete waste of time.

I would like to personally thank you for reviewing my letter and taking into consideration all that my son and I have experienced concerning our issues and the lack of positive attention to them. I am grateful for this opportunity to be "heard" and to be able to share with you my reasons for pulling my child out of the South Carolina public school system and making the wisest decision I have made for my child to home school him and to never ever allow him to set foot in your reprehensible school system again!!!!!


In the final analysis, the entire staff, each one who dealt with Griffin broke numerous federal and state laws including but not limited to; Section 504, IDEA, they did not provide him with an FBA (functional behavioral assessment), nor did they follow any of the laws governing the data and directives of the I.E.P. meetings.

The women who were at the administrative level only covered for the teachers and principal who dealt with Griffin and did not blink and eye when reading my letter as I watched with my last hope. I am not qualified nor do I have the capital to hire an attorney to represent me at a due process hearing for all that has been done to my child. I have yet to find a lawyer in this area who will work with me pro bono, this state and it's public school system have NOT won this battle because now my child is safe at home learning and being rewarded daily instead of being punished for being a child with autism.

On the positive side, as I like to see it because there's nothing else I can do at this point, it was a blessing in disguise and my dear son, Griffin, is home and happy right where he belongs. We have grown so close and he has developed in leaps and bounds. Home schooling is so tough and it is so difficult to adhere to but with just enough love and patience it can be done and my child is all the better for it! I now know that my child is growing in a natural and healthy manner and negativity is not even part of our vocabulary. Griffin has autism and there is nothing shameful about that, he no longer has to act out due to unnecessary punishment and his sensory needs are being fulfilled by him with his cuddle swing, his mini trampoline, and his other activities that we do throughout the day.

I am proud to have a child with autism and far as I am concerned, he will always be proud to be autistic because that is what I am teaching him.